As I mentioned in my last post, self-love is all about understanding and loving yourself unconditionally. So now the next question is, how can you practice self-love? Here are some easy ways to develop authentic love for yourself.

#1 Reflect:

 Have some silence to reflect on what you’re good at, how far you have gone in life and perhaps even what you hope to achieve in the next 5-10 years.

Self-reflecting can be de-stressing, and allows you to access your thought process in a refreshing way. If you’re stuck on what to write about, check out this 5-minute self-love sheet I put on Facebook!

#2 Express yourself

Try this: get a blank of paper, and grab any pen, pencil or any other materials you might want. Then, just draw. It doesn’t have to be good, but take some time to just draw what ever comes to your mind. When you’re finished, take a step back and look at your piece. What do you think you were trying to draw?

If you hate drawing and painting, another way to express yourself is by singing or dancing to your favourite song.

Whatever you do, let yourself go. Let yourself feel free.

#3 Don’t get beaten down by failure or insults 

Ever heard the phrase ‘sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me’. Remember, anyone can say whatever they want about you. But you don’t, and shouldn’t, believe them! If you are confident and accept your strengths and weaknesses, then you shouldn’t be affected by whatever anyone else says.

#4 Don’t say derogatory things about yourself or others

That being said, don’t insult anyone yourself. Sometimes, it’s easy to think and say bad things about others in order to make yourself feel better. However, you will find it more rewarding (and kinder) to empower others.

Similarly, don’t insult yourself either! We tend to criticise ourselves more harshly than we criticise others. Stop thinking you’re ugly, fat or stupid. It’s not true. All it does is lower self-esteem.

#5 Read some good self-love books

If you’re looking for some inspiration, or ‘feel good’ books to indulge in, try looking here for some great recommendations.

#6 Remind yourself of what you are good at: 

While your strengths and achievements don’t define you, you should still feel proud of them. When your confidence or self-esteem is feeling low, try sitting down and listing everything you’re good at.

#7 Have a progressive mindset:

Instead of thinking that you ‘suck’ at things, tell yourself you have some areas to improve on. We all have our weaknesses, so be positive and believe that you can work your shortcomings.

Similarly, instead of saying ‘I’ll try”, instead say “I’ll do it.” Saying you will ‘try’ is just basically setting yourself up for failure, but saying you’ll ‘do it’ shows and makes you feel confident of your abilities and capabilities.

#8 Give yourself a pep talk:

Every morning when you look in the mirror, try and consciously think of something positive, keep telling yourself it’s going to be good day. If you have something nerve racking that day, like a meeting with your boss or a presentation, then keep telling yourself you can do it. Tell yourself to be confident.

#9 Treat yourself:

Take a day off. Do something you haven’t done in a while which you haven’t had time to do, or try something new.

Or, go to your favourite cafe, get a massage or whatever else makes you happy.

Practice self-love by treating yourself once a while, just be careful not to do it too often. It’s especially effective when you’re feeling low in confidence or in morale.

#10 Be kind to yourself:

Being kind to others can help you achieve self-love. Other than not saying derogatory things to yourself, you should also be kind to yourself. When you’re tired or moody, don’t ignore it and keep exerting yourself. Take some time to take care of yourself and your health.

#11 Be nice to others:

When you’re nice to others, it gives you an optimistic sense of control and power. Think about it this way: it was your kind actions which made someone else’s day better.

It doesn’t take much effort to be nice. It can be something as simple as complimenting someone to bigger commitments like community service. 

#12 Have a self-love routine:

Maybe incorporate a series of actions which you do that make you feel good about yourself. You could make it part of your morning or evening routine, or just something you do when you feel you need a confidence boost.

For instance, when I’m feeling blue, I like to lock my door, listen to TED talks while sketching. Make your routine personal. It may take some time to figure out what your self-routine is.

#13 Stand up for yourself:

Practice self-love through having respect for yourself means not allowing yourself to tolerate any abuse of any kind. If someone deliberately tries to hurt you, verbally, physically or any other way, you should defend yourself.

#14 Stop comparing yourself:

Someone is always going to be ‘smarter’ or ‘better-looking’ or ‘better’ than you. I say this in quotation marks because there isn’t really a way to accurately gauge who is ‘better’ anyway.

So, stop comparing yourself! If you truly want to practice self-love, just be grateful for being who you are and accept it. 

#15 Spend time with those who love you:

There is nothing better sometimes, than being in the company of those who love and care for you. Make sure allocate time in your busy schedule to you surround yourself with your loved ones.

Read more:

Find out how I found self-love through my fitness journey.