The following has been edited for length and clarity.

I'm a native Californian, raised here my entire life, minus seven years I spent in Houston as a child.

I moved from the Inland Empire to Orange County in 2016 after my daughter graduated from high school. I started being outdoorsy, and the beach became very therapeutic and healing for me. I made a lot of great friends, and I got involved in the community.

I was always proud of California and what it represented. Until 2020.

I'm a Christian conservative, and the last four years have been a struggle. Between wearing a mask, the pandemic, the politics, the decline of our state, and our governor, it was too much.

My daughter couldn't afford to live here. She was going to move with or without me, and my parents, who were nearing retirement, also wanted to leave.

I really didn't want to be left behind.

I felt a connection to Texas because my grandparents were from there. My daughter and I visited Austin, but it was way too liberal.

I knew Dallas had a lot to offer in terms of sporting events and other stuff. It felt like it had a little bit of everything.

I was so nervous to move

I was very hesitant and really dragging my feet. Looking back, if I had listened to my intuition, I probably wouldn't have done it. But at the same time, I think everything happens for a reason.

My daughter and I moved to Dallas in May 2022. We lived together for the first year, renting a place right outside of the city. It was good we had each other.

The first few weeks we were in Texas, we were really excited. We went to a country concert, we went to the stockyard, and we tried a bunch of new restaurants.

I really liked the Texas politics. I'm a big fan of Gov. Abbott.

Heather Nickens said she missed the beach while living in Dallas.



Courtesy of Heather Nickens

Obviously, gas was cheaper. But the cost of living has gone up everywhere. When people say Texas is so much cheaper, I think, well, it is to some degree. My rent was cheaper, but my car insurance went up. There are no state taxes, but the property taxes are way higher. I just didn't see a big enough change in the cost of living.

Even so, we were gung ho on trying to get plugged in. But by August, I hit a wall.

I did nothing in Texas because the weather was so brutal. You couldn't even go outside. I didn't realize how much I really loved being outside until I moved to Texas.

I had given up the life I knew. I had major depression the entire time I was there. I started seeing a therapist and trying to work through my feelings.

I really, really missed the beach. In September 2023, I went to Galveston for Labor Day Weekend. Once I saw a mass body of water with waves, I broke down.

That's when I started crumbling. I didn't want to have to make the decision to come home, leave my daughter, and go further from my parents.

There was a lot of back-and-forth, but I thought long and hard about it. I started looking for jobs back in California.

Leaving was bittersweet

I moved back in May of this year, almost two years to the day I left.

My mom and my daughter both wanted me to be happy. But on the day I had to say goodbye to my daughter, I think reality smacked her in the face.

I've been very spoiled because for 52 years, I've lived with my mom, and for 26 years, I've had my daughter with me. So, for the three of us to be in different states is hard.

But my therapist told me the best example I could show my daughter is to choose myself and make myself happy.

Heather Nickens said she's happy to be back in California, regardless of the state's politics and high cost of living.



Courtesy of Heather Nickens

It's amazing to be back in California. My mood is one hundred times better than it was in Texas. One hundred times.

I've had a housewarming party, and I'm going to an Angels game later tonight. I've been able to see my friends.

We take the weather for granted here in California. You can smell the salt in the air. You can see the palm trees and the mountains. You can have a connection to nature here.

Obviously, California is still super expensive. My rent is way more. But my mood is a hundred times better, regardless of the price.

These days, I try to keep my head off social media and out of the news. Fortunately, living in Orange County is a bit of a conservative bubble for the most part.

Maybe as I get closer to retirement I would consider going back to Texas where my daughter is. But for the foreseeable future, I see myself staying in California.