Ever since dipping her toe into politics, Taylor Swift has been the target of countless conspiracy theories from members of the far right. The Onion explores the most convincing hoaxes that have recently been circulated about the singer-songwriter.Taylor Swift Calls The Chiefs’ Offensive PlaysShe’s not called a multi-hyphenate for nothing.She Never Actually Landed On The MoonLook very closely at the American flag, and you’ll see all you need to know.The Covid Vaccine Was Engineered To Turn People Into SwiftiesThere’s no other explanation as to why the world was so obsessed with Midnights.She Killed JesusShe basically admits it in the liner notes of her album Red.She Is Actually Another Chris Gaines–Style Alternate Persona Of Garth BrooksShe’s Had Plastic Surgery To Remove Her TailEspecially plausible since she’s already admitted getting surgery to remove a kangaroo pouch from her abdomen.Remotely Detonated The World Trade Center ExplosionsWho would expect an 11-year-old in Pennsylvania?The 9-Banded Armadillo Can Hold Its Breath For Up To 6 MinutesSwift is clearly the mastermind behind this cool armadillo fact.Secretly Controls Travis Kelce’s CareerPrior to last fall, did he show any interest in football whatsoever?Is Part Of A Plot To Conquer AmericaActually, she already did this.She Can Regulate Her Body Temperature With Her MindIt’s why you’ve never seen her wear a coat.She Didn’t Date John Mayer; She Is John MayerThat explains those guitar chops and sensitive lyrics.All Of Her Songs Are About Daniel Day-LewisThey did date for 12 years, after all.She Assassinated President GarfieldSwift was always rumored to harbor Stalwart resentment toward Garfield for being chosen as the party nominee over Chester Arthur.She Is Attracted To YouIf this one wasn’t true before you got that new haircut, it sure is now.Taylor Swift Is A Human BeingHopefully this theory isn’t true, because it’s much easier to continue treating her as both an object and a phenomenon.She’s Reading This Right Behind You